Creating Multiples

After sketchbooking for the entire evening trying to find out what exactly to do for this project- I've decided to explore the CBC culture. I find it oh so fascinating how we (CBC = Chinese Born Canadians) want so much not to be Chinese, but despite that our parents drill us so that we NEVER forget that we're Chinese. It's strange. It's like this whole culture of strangeness. Talking on behalf of my mother when I call up Rogers for example to help her with her phone bills, or calling up VISA and the typical, "can you speak to my daugher please, I no English."- is so common. Yet as strange as that is to most people (well at least to those whose parents could speak for themselves) we CBCs find that natural (forced-natural- doesn't matter). Then there's always this strange tone when I do get on the phone and talk for my mother, "sorry, my mom doens't speak English, can I talk on her behalf?"- oh the apolgies and then of course the rep on the line feels complete empathy and praises that your mother can speak English. Oh of course there is the "bring-your-Chinese-food-to-school" plan... that never ends up in complete embarassment. I remember opening up my tupperware and thinking to myself, "please, please be a sandwich- PLEASE." and it ends up being rice with some cut up fish lying on top of the rice and some soya sauce with some leaks on the side. I could hear people giggling around me already... "that smells Wynne- !!!" I throw my tupperware back into my backpack.... Oh, and of course when everyone's going out to McDonald's on Saturday morning, where do we get to go? CHINESE SCHOOL!!! For nine years of my life I was forced to attend Chinese school every Saturday morning from 9am - 12pm. It was like a never ending ritual that you prayed and hoped that it would end the following year- and that sleeping in on the weekends would be possible... and perhaps finally being able to go to a slumber party without having to leave in the morning.

Just a little background of being CBC- there are a TON of examples though, and of which I find them so fascinating because it shapes us- the basis of who we are. Although we are physically and genetically Chinese- we are not fully Chinese. In part, we are white on the inside, and we try very hard to be that way- some may dispute that and say that they're proud to be Asian, but the reality is that the way we were brough up we were always torn between the two worlds, and the truth is that really- we belong to our own worlds. The CBC, twinkie... the world of the "in-betweens", and instead of trying to be a part of another group, which is what we are constantly doing, why not be who we are- Canadian Born Chinese.

The question now remains is who are we? We are always in-between of different groups. We could be whatever you want us to be. We are a fusion of different cultures, but by doing so we have created our own customs, beliefs and rituals. Although they may not be evident, CBCs know what they are, but we never really talk about them in conversations, we just know what they are.

I would like to bring those expriences, rituals, beliefs to the surface and create multiples. For final piece will be a combination of responses and photographs from 100 CBCs. Specific questions will be asked, and they will be asked to return the information to me via email/regular mail. The result will be a wall full of documents, written and printed to keep as a record of who we are, and that we are something, something different, and something unique from other things even though we may have always seemed to be up in the air.

The questions that will be asked are very specific.
1. What physical feature do you possess that other CBCs also possess?
(this question is important because Chinese people could immediately distinguish if you are born in Canada or born in Hong Kong/China)

2. What's one thing that you do as a CBC that you find that nobody else other than CBC's need to do?

3. Name a reason why you're proud to be CBC.


I plan to do a test for this with some of my friends, and see what kind of responses I get... And I know that retrieving 100 responses isn't easy, but I want to do more, if I could do more than 100 I would. The more the better.

This is public, participatory and community art. I want it to reflect who we are and be proud of it, even if it means that sometimes we're caught up in the middle a little bit.

Wynne

Cullture....
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I think I know what I'm looking for.
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Asian Canadian... A blog set up for Asian-community news... Apparently they refuse to screeen "Memoirs of a Geisha" in China, because all leading actresses are Chinese;
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Chinese school.... Brings back memories. I'm trying to "jive" my inspiration. It's interesting though, because each province has its own Asian Heritage Month Festivals
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.... you need to see this video. this chinese woman is cooking friend rice with different colors to signify different races.,
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I'm intrigued
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just read the quote below... "there's a place for us out there. I know it. and if there isn't, we'll damn well make one."

I can't believe that wikipedia has an article about "jook sings"

http://www.diversitywatch.ryerson.ca/glossary/b.htm

Banana Boys (a blog that was inspired from the novel)

Ohmygosh

Maybe rambling on about things will exercise the mind.... so that inspiration will spit out - please do.

Language has played a huge part in my life. It has both helped me succeed and fail- in different ways. Succeed in a sense that it helped me cope with different groups of people, and feel like I belong in that group, whether it was a group of all Chinese people, or all Caucasian people, or all African American people... doesn't matter. Language made me feel like I was a part of "them". But who am I?.... I'm Wynne... I know that I'm Chinese, but apparently I'm not fully Chinese because I'm from here... But I'm not Caucasian either...

I'm torn between these two worlds, and longing to belong somewhere to someone... to call myself and be proud to call myself "something".

Here we go again.

I think that I finally got it- I finally understand what I want to understand. Sounds demented, but yes, I think I finally got it.

As I went back to my drawing board this entire week.... I realized that ultimately what I'm trying to say is very simple. I want to directly comment on the power of language, with respect to it's powers of allowing people certain opportunities over others.

I know that nothing is by accident, as Tanya says.... subconciously we chose to do certain things. I know that I chose to do this project about language because it meant something to me. During this whole week I continuously went braindead for ideas about this project and ripping my hair out because I am struggling to find out what the heck is it that I want to comment about language.